Friday, November 14, 2008


Ok, I am on antibiotics for a chest infection so I'm not in the best of moods, but even in a better mood I still hate Children in need day!
As a mother of 4 for starters people expect you to contribute 4 times - the big two come home from school with letters saying they can dress in their own clothes today but must make a minimum donation of £1 to to Children in Need charity - for minimum £1 in East Renfrewshire read about £3 - so that's £6 for starters, then the little one comes in with a sponsor form. He's doing a sponsored 'welly walk' for Children in Need 2pm to 3pm - so you are expected to rustle up another £10 or £20 for that, oh and they have the cheek to ask you to come along and supervise the activity at nursery as an adult helper - so they want dosh and your time. Then the littlest one - thank God she's stopped going to toddlers' because they want £1 minimum towards a Pudsey cookie today. So imagine I had contributed the required amount to save face - that's me down £27 before I leave the house. I then go to ASDA to pick up antibiotics for my chest infection and someone dressed as a large bear rattles a bucket in your face and tuts when you don't cough up another quid. Then into the office (thank heavens I am still on maternity leave officially) because there too I would be expected to wear a green wig and no doubt pay another £3 for a homemade cookie on the first floor. That's me up to £31.
Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against charity, it is these mass UK charity events I hate with a passion. If I want to give to charity, I want to give to a charity chosen by me and when I want. I might want to sponsor an African orphan, or give money towards research in MS or diabetes for example, but I don't want coerced into it and tutted at if I chose to do it next week and not this.
I think the real problem of these large sponsored events is that I am too European and not British enough. These mass charity galas just piss me off. I find them alien to my culture and incredibly off-putting. Sponsored anything immediately gets my back up. Idiots sitting in cold beans having their hair dyed green is never going to get me running to the bank for a donation. In fact it is more likely to get me sitting under my duvet avoiding the TV and radio and the idiots with the buckets.
Worse still they force Terry Wogan and Keith Chegwin in your face all day.
As my old Gramps might have said - Awwah an' bile yer heids - yer no gettin' a penny affa me!
I will now go and not watch TV for the rest of the day in protest. I think I am doing well so far this year. It is 1-39pm and they've only got £1 out of me so far and that is because nursery wasn't letting you in without a donation!


Thomas Widmann said...

So they turned Pudge away at nursery? Is that legal?

Phyl said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Phyl said...

The bastards are craftier than that - they stand blocking the door holding out a bucket marked 'Pounds for Pudsey', the head mistress then says to the 3 year olds as they come in - 'do you want to put a pound in the bucket?', the kid then looks at you with huge pleading blue eyes and you know if you say no it'll break his heart. You give the kid the pound and as he drops it in the bucket the teacher laughs and jokes: Oh it looks like we aren't letting you in today without paying - hahaha we couldn't do that - grrrrrrrrr.

Thomas Widmann said...

So the silly buggers had to change his shoes in your stead?

Phyl said...

You've lost me???? He was wearing wellies of course?

Thomas Widmann said...

I forgot that bit! :-( So they didn't want you to help unless you paid for it?!?

Phyl said...

Dunno - I refused to help - Anna was asleep, I had no buggy and I had a chest infection - I left all it to the show-off airhead mums in the the designer tracksuits to welly-walk!

The Scudder said...

That's my girl ,.,.Make a stand !
Don't let the big ones dress in their own clothes & if you do don't go a ha'penny over the min £1 ,,, don't hustle anyone for sponsor money for the wee one's wellie walk ,,especially not ME ,,
anyone rattling a bucket in front of you ,, spit in it ! but cough first to get rid of some of your infected chestal stuff !!
Don't get me wrong either btw ,,
I have a lot of time for charity too but only the kind that starts at HOME .,,. preferably MINE HOME !
Nothing to do with your European-ness and not being British enough. These mass charity galas piss me off too.
A final word on the subject then .,
Let me get this right ,.,.
Am I to understand you're NOT going to sponsor your old Dad to shave off his beard for kiddies in need ?? Aw, shame on you !!